Trophies

The end of term is within sight. A relief all round. On the whole it has been a good year. We have some very good SATs result with which to appease Ofsted and the Deputy is now firmly in role. We had a good school moment just a couple of weeks ago when our youngest children went up to the village church to talk to the Vicar. (They had designed their own questions and the first one was, “Did Jesus survive?” Interesting at many levels but difficult to give an answer to someone who is five.) Anyway, as part of the talk the vicar produced this large, decorated silver chalice. The eyes of the children all widened, particularly those of Alex aged 5, who looked on and asked, “Where do you keep your other football trophies?”

I saw the consultant last Friday, just for a quick conversation. They will scan me again later in August and meet to discuss the results early in September. The only thing that has changed is that they have altered the pain management, adding a morphine solution to the usual routine. It is the same old problem of waking with leg pain at about 2 am and not really getting back to sleep. I will now take some of the morphine solution when I wake and hopefully this will see me through. I am still pleased to be treatment free for the summer, and if I can manage the pain more successfully then we should hopefully enjoy a few good weeks.

It’s Sports Day today in school. I am on the score board this year, as being a line judge proved to be too frightening last year. You really take your life in your hands! Many schools have opted to give out ‘Well Done’ stickers to all the competitors, but I am still of the view that there should be outright winners, who receive trophies and/or certificates. After all, it is one of life’s important lessons … you can’t be good at everything and some children do excel in sport. That said, last year whenever I declared the winner of race, I quickly felt like a lone wildebeest in a David Attenborough documentary, being stalked by an approaching pack of hungry predators. I might just carry a few sheets of ‘Headteacher’s Award’ stickers, in case.

I will leave you with some pictures of Martha’s birthday celebrations. Where did those years go?

Thanks for visiting the blog.

Scan Results

I think it's fair to say that Mary and I were pretty tense going into the meeting, especially when the speed with which we were ushered into the consultation room denied us the chance of reading the stories behind the cover headlines on trashy magazines. So, we'll never know which LA Hunk Jen from Friends is going to settle for, or why Denise from Loose Women is so ashamed of her recent behaviour. Anyway, his opening sentence was

The scan looked pretty good

and from this particular consultant that is a very positive statement. There has been no development of the pelvic tumours, either in the soft tissue or the bone. They are pretty much the same, so new pains further round my back can't be that. My liver is still clear. My lungs have three 'spots' but two of them are too small to measure and the third, which is about 1 cm, is not at the stage of requiring treatment. So ... no chemo or any other treatment for now. In the circumstances, this is good news. The situation is still stable. Bring on the summer!

Thank you to everyone who has contacted me over recent days; we have really appreciated your support. Thanks also to the many people from far and wide who pray for us and who were praying specifically for good news.

Friday

I have a meeting with the Senior Consultant this Friday morning to discuss a scan I had last Friday. It was penciled in anyway, but a slight increase in symptoms has meant that it is timely. I have some extra pain further round the top end of my pelvis which, we all agree, needs looking into. We are keeping an open mind (well, trying to) and we'll just have to re-adjust to whatever is found. That said, we are obviously hoping and praying that things haven't progressed in any great way.

We are all well, other than this. Naomi auditioned successfully for a production of The Railway Children that is being staged by the York Theatre Royal. She did this last year and loved it, so she is very pleased! Martha is preparing (?) for her GCSE in science, which has reminded me of just how challenged I am in this area. Attempts to help her with revision have been fairly fruitless. (I remember my science teacher being disappointed, but not surprised, at my Grade E in Chemistry.) Joel is still happy going to school, which makes life much easier for us, and Mary and I are trying to follow his example.

I will update the blog with Friday's results as soon as I have them. I will also try to get a recent poem up here, so that I can feel the blog title is justified!

The Past Few Weeks

Well, the radiotherapy course came and went, all in the luxury of the new £250 million oncology Centre of Excellence in Leeds. It's a cross between an airport lounge and a shopping mall and patients wait in clusters of seats. If they sold lattes or espressos you might be tempted to turn up in shorts, towing a case. The week of treatment was difficult for various reasons. I got an infection (which floored me) and a strongly worded letter of complaint to the school (which had me leaping back up again). Such letters can really get the circulation going. Anyway, I dragged myself in on the Thursday, a meeting was had with said parents and all was well. I think the Friday of the treatment week was the high point, however. I was lying in bed at midday, temperature soaring, body aching, drifting in and out of sleep when the phone went. I decided to leave it ... nothing was that important. Then my mobile went, so I played safe. It was the alarm company, saying that they'd received the signal that the school fire alarm was going off and they were in the process of contacting the Fire Service. It's amazing how quickly you can dress ... I was fully clothed in under four seconds and that included ironing. Okay - exaggeration. I was actually falling down the stairs towards the door when the phone went again and it was my deputy confessing to having burnt the toast in the staffroom. It's an easy thing to forgive, and I went back to bed.

The weeks since the treatment have been difficult, with the draining effects of radio, further infections and of course the bone strengthening infusions which cause flu symptoms. It is demoralising, never feeling particularly well, but I feel like I am re-surfacing now. I have a bit more energy. On the positive side, my pain levels have been reduced and life is more comfortable again. I am seeing the consultant on Friday to discuss all this and I would love to think I can be left alone for a few weeks/months and get through the summer without having to have any more treatment. We'll see. The family are all well and we have enjoyed a great Easter break in Scotland with friends. (Actually, during that visit, Martha fell off a swing and hurt her foot. After four days we took her to the hospital and it turns out she has badly torn ligaments ... in my defence she is a teenager and so dragging limbs is not unusual.) We have also enjoyed Joel's eighth birthday and Mary's 40-something birthday. Joel's very funny when it's his birthday. He loves it but can't bear to be the centre of attention. I've attached some photos that demonstrate this ...

I hope you have had a good Easter. Thanks, as always, for visiting the blog.

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A Quick Note.

This is just a quick update about Friday's results. The Senior Consultant gave us about an hour of his time (is that a good thing?) and talked through the options. As always - good news and bad. The good news is that my lungs and liver are still clear. This is significant, as it is those areas that are potentially going to cause the most trouble. However, the illness has progressed in the pelvis, growing into the bone and starting the invasion of the bladder wall. So, I am going to have a five day course of radiotherapy in the near future in the hope that it will reduce the symptoms and might even cause tumour shrinkage. They are holding off on the chemo for now, and are more likely to start that when when tumours appear outside of the pelvis.

Mary and I feel okay about this. Obviously not happy at the disease's progress, but I think we were braced for something worse. We are both pleased at the delay in chemo. The girls have been in a dance performance today and yesterday so it has been nicely chaotic on that front, allowing us to get lost and distracted in sequins, tights and deadlines.(Spare me the offensive remarks ...) Joel is just enjoying the feeling of being alive, which is significant ... the music shop phoned to say that the reason my bass rig went on fire and destroyed itself has a lot to do with the fact that someone posted a 5p piece into the electrics. Bless that cuddly wee soul; butter wouldn't melt ...

The Truth Will Out ...

The first morning back to work after a break is always a bit chaotic. We had a class going off on a week’s residential trip this morning and so the hall was full of weeping mothers – some weeping out of concern and a sense of loss, other out of sheer relief. I am always amazed at the luggage that turns up, and attempts to smuggle things like hair-straighteners, Body Shop stock rooms and HUGE packed lunches into cases. (I remember on one trip I organised, a boy was being sick before we had even got on the coach! When asked if he had eaten anything on the way to school, he confessed to two pork pies and a beef jerky. Not good! ) Additionally this morning, I noticed one younger pupil arriving with a huge fake tattoo right up the back of his neck. "Like Daddy," he told me... Anyway, to cut a long story short (which I hate doing) I got the dreaded ‘Number Withheld’ call amidst all the chaos. In the recent scans my kidneys are looking enlarged again, and so I am off for a blood test this afternoon. I meet with my consultant on Friday when he will basically go through the two scans in detail and explain ‘implications.’ I confess to being uptight about this; I was put onto morphine recently but it isn’t completely sorting the problem. That said, I am not in agony and am still able to get on with life’s normal tasks, such as exploring tattoo removal on the NHS.

For those pray-ers amongst you, mats at the ready please. I will let you know how Friday goes.

Quick Update

I want it to be known that my school did not close due to snow … sadly. There was huffing, tantruming, tears, and shouts of ‘That’s not fair!’ … from the staff … but we remained open nevertheless. Half term beckons at the end of this week so suddenly all seems well again.

Mary and I have been through the mill a little since last we spoke. I became unwell quite quickly a couple of weeks ago … tiredness, temperatures and pain levels doubling. More worryingly, I have been losing weight and I could feel almost daily changes to the main tumour; we were both beginning to panic. The consultant brought me straight into hospital and told us he suspected that the primary tumour had developed an abscess. Oddly enough, that brought relief all round as I was fearing the worst. Anyway, things have returned to normal now but I have just had two scans this week because they have rightly said that they need to actually see what is going on. I will get results in a couple of weeks, unless there is something dodgy going on, in which case I will get a call with ‘number withheld’ on my phone display … always a bit of a pulse quickener. As soon as I hear, I’ll let you know.

Mary and the girls are in the village panto next week (Oh yes they are!) Coincidentally, Joel and I are off to Scotland this weekend for a few days of bonding. Anything could happen … I’ll post the photos when we get back.